Anyone who has followed true crime over the past several years will be the first to tell you that one of the craziest cases in recent history was that of the Idaho Four. But this week, I read James Patterson and Vicky Ward’s in-depth look at the story, The Idaho Four: An American Tragedy, and I learned that there are far more disturbing details than what the news covered while just scratching the surface.

Four college students at the University of Idaho with their whole lives ahead of them, sleeping or hanging out in their own rooms at home after a big game night. It’s such a familiar scene for so many young Americans. We’re supposed to feel safe and comfortable at home in those moments, resting after making memories with friends. But for these four students, there were no more memories to be made because their lives were ripped away in an instant.

Bryan Kohberger had no clear connection to any of the four, but given the evidence presented in the book, I’d say it’s fair to conclude that he was likely stalking at least one of the girls he killed. There were a lot of points brought up that I’d never heard before about his past, along with more specific details showing concerning behaviors that honestly should’ve been red flags for many people in Kohberger’s life. Yet the most disturbing part for me was reading that a friend of his family told the authors that Kohberger’s own father still believed his son had been framed. It’s sad to have to face the harsh reality that your loved one could do such a thing, but you can’t just deny DNA evidence.

Patterson and Ward conducted many interviews with people from all sides of this tragedy to present a compelling account of the lives and deaths of Kaylee Goncalves, Maddie Mogen, Xana Kernodle, and Ethan Chapin in a way that remained sensitive and respectful to their memories. I also loved a quote included from Ethan’s mother when she spoke to a crowd at a true crime convention, reminding them to remember the victims for their lives and not just how they died. I think a lot of people in the true crime community get carried away with their fascination and forget that these victims were someone’s child, too.

I’ll always remember first hearing about this case and how emotionally damaging it felt even as an outsider, because in my own early 20s, it felt too close to home. This could have happened to any friend group on any college campus. The victims seemed so relatable, and that made it all the more devastating.

This can be a very hard read for the faint of heart, but if you’re a true crime fan, I’d say this one is essential. Just remember to keep the victims’ memories alive.