I’ve always had a soft spot for the books I loved growing up, especially the ones that encouraged my fascination with darker, creepier stories. Cirque du Freak by Darren Shan is one of those books that has stuck with me since childhood, and although it’s been years since I first read it, I still remember how much I loved it.

I was in sixth grade when one of my aunts in Ireland sent me a box of gifts, which included the first two or three books in the Cirque du Freak series. Around that time, the movie adaptation, Cirque du Freak: The Vampire’s Assistant, had recently been released, and I’d gone to see it in theaters with my brother and his best friend. I remember absolutely loving the movie, but for whatever reason, I didn’t initially make the connection that the books my aunt had sent me were the same story. It wasn’t until I started reading that I realized what I had.

For those unfamiliar with the story, Cirque du Freak follows a young boy named Darren Shan (also the given author’s name to make it feel more authentic, which I always thought was a cool detail), whose fascination with spiders leads him into the strange world of a traveling freak show. After attending a performance with his best friend, Steve, Darren becomes particularly fascinated with a mysterious performer named Mr. Crepsley and his deadly spider, Madam Octa. Unfortunately, Darren’s curiosity gets the better of him, and a series of unfortunate decisions leaves him facing a choice that will change his life forever.

Growing up, middle-grade horror was easily one of my favorite genres. I was also in middle school during the height of the Twilight craze, so vampires were certainly having their moment among my age group. While Cirque du Freak was a very different kind of vampire story, it fit perfectly with the sort of books I was already drawn to.

One of my favorite things about the book was its atmosphere. I’ve always thought that a traveling circus makes a fantastic setting for a creepy story, and this series really leaned into that idea. Between the bizarre performers, mysterious creatures, and unsettling atmosphere, the Cirque du Freak itself was easily one of the most memorable parts of the story for me.

I wouldn’t necessarily say that I found the book frightening as a child. I was much more fascinated by its darker elements than scared of them, although I can certainly see how some younger readers might find parts of the story a little too disturbing. For kids who already enjoy spooky books, though, I think it strikes a nice balance between horror and adventure.

As far as the characters go, I remember really liking both Darren and Mr. Crepsley. Steve, on the other hand, got on my nerves pretty much from the beginning. Even as a kid, I remember thinking he was far too whiny for my liking.

Something else that stands out in my memory is just how easily I got absorbed in this book. I distinctly remember sneaking it under my desk during class so I could keep reading when I was supposed to be paying attention. If that’s not a sign of a book keeping a sixth grader entertained, I don’t know what is.

Looking back, I think this series played a role in shaping my reading interests. I was already drawn to darker fiction, but Cirque du Freak certainly encouraged that fascination. For someone who grew up reading books like A Series of Unfortunate Events, this series fit right in with the creepy, unusual stories I loved.

I also have to mention the movie adaptation because it was such a memorable part of my introduction to the series. John C. Reilly played Mr. Crepsley, and I thought he was fantastic in the role. He brought a comedic quality to the character that made the movie especially entertaining. A few months ago, I actually convinced my husband to watch it with me. It was the first time I’d seen it since childhood, and I was happy to discover that he loved it too.

That being said, I would definitely recommend reading the books before watching the movie. The adaptation combines elements from the first three books, so it isn’t exactly a faithful, book-by-book retelling.

Ultimately, Cirque du Freak is one of those childhood favorites that I still look back on fondly. It was a fun, creepy adventure for the little weirdo kid I was, and I think plenty of other young nonconformists would find something to love about it too.

I’d especially recommend it to middle-grade readers who are interested in exploring darker fiction but aren’t quite ready for more intense horror. If you prefer your stories a little strange and unsettling, Cirque du Freak might be right up your alley.